How many bars do you have?

Experiences in normal people.

For those who don’t know, I run a no-charge VoIP phone number. I don’t pay for cell phone service, I just use WiFi + VoIP. It starts a lot of arguments with the terminally fuckin’ dumb. “You said you didn’t have cell service, but I saw you talking on the phone at [fill in the blank that has WiFi]!” Don’t you usually hear someone talking? I know, I’m splitting hairs and avoiding the obvious becaue it’s obvious…

Usually iPhone users, and always female.

I just wanted to share my pain…

These are real conversations I have (repeatedly) had with so-called “people” with whom I was having a hard time staying connected.

Me: How much signal do you have?
Her: I don’t know what that means.
Me: How strong is the cell signal?
Her: Why are you talking weird?
Me: How many bars do you have?
Her: Oh, just one.
Me: So, do you think maybe that’s why we keep getting disconnected?
Her: No, it’s that stupid weirdo thing you use for talking on the phone. Why can’t you just be normal?
Me: Sweetie, because I’m way better than normal.

No, I never called her back after that.

Me: How much signal do you have?
Her: I don’t know, how do I check?
(at least she wants to know how to check! Maybe she’s got hope?)
Me: at the top of the screen there are a few icons, one looks like an antenna with bars…
Her: Oh, none!
Me: Well there’s your problem…
Her: Where do I buy more signal?

I hung up. How dare you give me hope that you might just barely have a brain, then say some shit like that… Fuck you.

Me: How many bars do you have?
Her: [while clearly drunk] I’m at a bar, but I’m not drunk.

I didn’t even know what to say. I was speachless and she hung up. Oh darn…

How is it that people, especially women, have managed to get so fucking stupid? Don’t you dare call me a misogynist. I never have this problem on a phone call with a man. Only women are this amazingly fucking dumb.

They’re only going to breed with losers like themselves… Women are ruining the species. They really are nothing more than a life support system for a reproductive organ. You can’t have a relationship with that.

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